How is this?

“The Key to Extinction”


On night, after eating chocolate ice cream, God had a horrible nightmare. He envisioned His mom yelling and scolding at Him, for having such a messy room. After finally waking up from his boundless tormenting dream, He got up and searched his computer for the greatest cleaner on earth. It took him a flash of light for His 1997 Dell computer to jump start and go onto the internet to search up the cleanest person living in the world. On Godgle’ list, the fastest search engine ever to be built, the name Jesus Cortez was on the top, with the record holding “The Earths Best Cleaner.” A light bulb went on, above God’s head, and he said, “I’ve got it.” With a wave of his fingers, He summons Death to bring up Mr. Cortez from Earth.


After an hour past, Death comes back to God and behind him was scared little Jesus.


“What took you so long?” God said to Death.


“The drunk driver pulled over for some coffee,” Death said.


With great confusion, Jesus finally said out load, “Hrare am I? Last thing I remember was that I saw a flash of light and now I am here. I demand an explanation.”


“You are in heaven my son,” God said, “I have brought you here to help me do something.”


“Heaven, but I never went to church except the time I went to paint the walls.”


“Aye, my son, for I have brought u here to ask you to help me clean thy room. It is a mess!” with those words God puts His hand on Jesus’ shoulders and leads him to His room. After a short walk, passing the Garden of Eden, they stop in front of a pair of massive door. “Aye, braise yourself my son” and He opens the doors.


With a great shock, Jesus’ jaws dropped as similar as the apple when Newton found gravity. “Oh my,” Jesus mumbled.


“Aye, it was this way since man was around. You see, my son, men always have a handful of problems they want me to solve, and I try to do my best, so I don’t have time to fix anything in my room. That is why I brought you here. This is my one job for you, Jesus. Can you help me?”


“Yes Sir,” Jesus said and went straight to work.


God suddenly stopped him and walked him straight to a little hole with purple light and a sign, saying “Warning Do not put the Key in the Hole.”


“What is this?” asked Jesus.


God pointed to a black key to the left and said, “This, my son is “The Key to Extinction. Don’t ever put the key in this hole!” and with out saying another word God left to finish off His work.


Jesus worked quickly to clean God’s sloppy room. It tool him a long time, but after six hours of hard and exhausting cleaning Jesus finally finished. He started walking toward the doors but accidentally bumped into the table with made a rumble and shook off the two signs and key of the table. The signs slipped into the back of the garbage can and the key fell on Jesus’ shoe. Not noticing the signs in the wastes he picked up the key and looked around. He spotted a little key hole on the wall and he tried to remember what God had said before about some sort of key. The key looked as if it was suppose to belong within the hole, so he stuck the key into the hole and walked out of the room.


“Are you finished with cleaning the room” God asked.


“Yes sir,” Jesus replied.


Suddenly, there was a sound coming from the computer, which Jesus recognized. The sound made him remember the time when he was talking to his seven kids about the internet, when suddenly a weird noise came on from the computer.


“Sir, I think you have an I.M.,” Jesus said.


When God walked over to his computer he was shocked. His eyes almost jumped out of its socket. He quickly went to his room and left Jesus standing there. Since Jesus was tired from the cleaning he slipped onto God’s computer chair, which had a label from Ikea. He then heard the same familiar “Boink” sound coming from the computer. It caught his attention and the information from the computer caused him to fall onto the ground. The message read


“Warning, the world is in trouble. There is a “Green House Effect” in the atmosphere causing global warming. The carbon, created from the factories and cars, have tripled the oxygen. There is also an imbalance of salt and fresh water within the ocean cause from the melting of the polar ice caps and creating much more violent storms all across the world.” Suddenly another “Boink” came up and this message said, “Warning, killer comet from space is going to collide with earth. Warning, new influenza found flying with birds.


Suddenly God comes back into the room furiously, “What on God’s World did you do!!”


Jesus replies, “Clean your room?”

How is this?
NOT FUNNY! Too long people fall asleep before they get to the punch line. Whatever that was.
Reply:I'm sorry, but I thought it would be funnier.
Reply:a novel joke... thanx
Reply:lol
Reply:way too long+not even funny=waste of my time
Reply:longest joke ever. in the history of jokes.. I couldnt even finish it.
Reply:This is not interesting at all. All of this global warming is bad and shouldn't be made into a joke. It is serious and this all happend because of us not Jesus. That is an insult to All jesus's and cleaners.
Reply:Too long and not too funny.
Reply:you expect me to take 20 minutes to read that!!



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