Monday, April 20, 2009

Silver Shoes - HELP?!?

hey everyone





i was just wondering if anyone knew where i could find a pair of shoes like those pictured up the top of this website.


www.lorisshoes.com/department.asp?dept...





(The black and silver ones labeled %26#039;evening%26#039;).





I absolutely fell in love with them and really want them for my formal but they arent listed at the website.





thanks heaps!





( i know i posted already but the links werent working- sorry!)

Silver Shoes - HELP?!?
Thosee


Errr


Adorable..


You


Can


Check


There


Other


Items..


But


I


Juss


Browsed


Fer


Some


Pumps


%26amp;%26amp;


I


Got


This:





http://cgi.ebay.com/HOT-HOT-PUMP-2-Tone-...





http://cgi.ebay.com/PARTY-READY-Peek-Toe...
Reply:Sorry I don%26#039;t know exactly where to get them. You might try Victoria Secrets, Ebay.



loan

Is gay the new gucci?

Gucci, Prada, Louis Vuitton, BCBG.Gay, Lesbian, Queer.The new fashion label. Queer, Gay Lesbian come try on the new labels. I’ve come to see and realize something over the course of my years and more so today more than ever to take on these labels means that you are now in the new what’s hot. Being gay being queer or whatever label you feel to throw onto yourself. Doesn’t mean you do it today because it’s something fun and cool to do. You embrace it, you live it. It’s not a pair shoes you try on today and take it off tomorrow. It means you live in this life and understand the struggles of those who came before you, so you could have to have the right to walk the streets and hold hands or go to the clubs you go to. It means to respect the fact there are other who have know since they were children this is who they are. This is not easy life for anyone to live. It’s not game to play so you can run back to tell you friends and say your “lesbian” or “gay” “experience” Because this is not an experience this is life. This is the life that we live everyday having to have our families and friends understand why we live the lives we do and why we love who we love.

Is gay the new gucci?
depends





is gay over priced?
Reply:Why, cause Gay %26amp; Gucci rhyme??? DON%26#039;T disrespect Gucci like that!
Reply:It has always bothered me that people think you are gay, as it%26#039;s the latest trend. It doesn;t work that way
Reply:If gay has anything to do with gucci then gay is sad. Because gucci is the worst out there, its soooo tacky! Have you seen the people who wear the sh*t!? I%26#039;m not talking about the one-of -a-kind 20K gowns that celebs wear. No i%26#039;m talking about that monogrammed logo crap. Or those ugly bags with those huge metal clasp on it. Yucky stuff, really! so yeah, if gay is anything, it should have nothing to do with some big brand name like gucci.
Reply:I was getting REALLY angry until about halfway down. I essentially thought you were saying the exact opposite of what you were saying; all gay people are just doing it to be cool. And I was going to inform you that it%26#039;s not so %26quot;cool%26quot; where I live etc. (And, I still think most males can%26#039;t get away with it like females can). But...yeah. I follow, and almost completely agree.



skin rash

Bad date excuses,long ones?

If your date ever uses any of these lines, you know its game over.





1. I have to floss my cat.





2. I%26#039;ve dedicated my life to linguini.





3. I want to spend more time with my blender.





4. The President said he might drop in.





5. The man on television told me to say tuned.





6. I%26#039;ve been scheduled for a karma transplant.





7. I%26#039;m staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.





8. It%26#039;s my parakeet%26#039;s bowling night.





9. It wouldn%26#039;t be fair to the other Beautiful People.





10. I%26#039;m building a pig from a kit.





11. I did my own thing and now I%26#039;ve got to undo it.





12. I%26#039;m enrolled in aerobic scream therapy.





13. There%26#039;s a disturbance in the Force.





14. I%26#039;m doing door-to-door collecting for static cling.





15. I have to go to the post office to see if I%26#039;m still wanted.





16. I%26#039;m teaching my ferret to yodel.





17. I have to check the freshness dates on my dairy products.





18. I%26#039;m going through cherry cheesecake withdrawal.





19. I%26#039;m planning to go downtown to try on gloves.





20. My crayons all melted together.





21. I%26#039;m trying to see how long I can go without saying yes.





22. I%26#039;m in training to be a household pest.





23. I%26#039;m getting my overalls overhauled.





24. My patent is pending.





25. I%26#039;m attending the opening of my garage door.





26. I%26#039;m sandblasting my oven.





27. I%26#039;m worried about my vertical hold.





28. I%26#039;m going down to the bakery to watch the buns rise.





29. I%26#039;m being deported.





30. The grunion are running.





31. I%26#039;ll be looking for a parking space.





32. My Millard Filmore Fan Club meets then.





33. The monsters haven%26#039;t turned blue yet, and I have to eat more


dots.





34. I%26#039;m taking punk totem pole carving.





35. I have to fluff my shower cap.





36. I%26#039;m converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian.





37. I%26#039;ve come down with a really horrible case of something or


other.





38. I made an appointment with a cuticle specialist.





39. My plot to take over the world is thickening.





40. I have to fulfill my potential.





41. I don%26#039;t want to leave my comfort zone.





42. It%26#039;s too close to the turn of the century.





43. I have some real hard words to look up in the dictionary.





44. My subconscious says no.





45. I%26#039;m giving nuisance lessons at a convenience store.





46. I left my body in my other clothes.





47. The last time I went out, I never came back.





48. I%26#039;ve got a Friends of Rutabaga meeting.





49. I have to answer all of my %26quot;occupant%26quot; letters.





50. None of my socks match.





51. I have to be on the next train to Bermuda.





52. I%26#039;m having all my plants neutered.





53. People are blaming me for the Spanish-American War.





54. I changed the lock on my door and now I can%26#039;t get out.





55. I%26#039;m making a home movie called %26quot;The Thing That Grew in My


Refrigerator. %26quot;





56. I%26#039;m attending a perfume convention as guest sniffer.





57. My yucca plant is feeling yucky.





58. I%26#039;m touring China with a wok band.





59. My chocolate-appreciat ion class meets that night.





60. I never go out on days that end in %26quot;Y.%26quot;





61. My mother would never let me hear the end of it.





62. I%26#039;m running off to Yugoslavia with a foreign-exchange student


named Basil Metabolism.





63. I just picked up a book called %26quot;Glue in Many Lands%26quot; and I can%26#039;t


put it down.





64. I%26#039;m too old/young for that stuff.





65. I have to ash/condition/ perm/curl/ tease my hair.





66. I have too much guilt.





67. There are important world issues that need worrying about.





68. I have to draw %26quot;Cubby%26quot; for an art scholarship.





69. I%26#039;m uncomfortable when I%26#039;m alone or with others.





70. I promised to help a friend fold road maps.





71. I feel a song coming on.





72. I%26#039;m trying to be less popular.





73. My bathroom tiles need grouting.





74. I have to bleach my hare.





75. I%26#039;m waiting to see if I%26#039;m already a winner.





76. I%26#039;m writing a love letter to Richard Simmons.





77. You know how we psychos are.





78. My favorite commercial is on TV.





79. I have to study for a blood test.





80. I%26#039;m going to be old someday.





81. I%26#039;ve been traded to Cincinnati.





82. I%26#039;m observing National Apathy Week.





83. I have to rotate my crops.





84. My uncle escaped again.





85. I%26#039;m up to my elbows in waxy buildup.





86. I have to knit some dust bunnies for a charity bazaar.





87. I%26#039;m having my baby shoes bronzed.





88. I have to go to court for kitty littering.





89. I%26#039;m going to count the bristles in my toothbrush.





90. I have to thaw some karate chops for dinner.





91. Having fun gives me prickly heat.





92. I%26#039;m going to the Missing Persons Bureau to see if anyone is


looking for me.





93. I have to jog my memory.





94. My palm reader advised against it.





95. My Dress For Obscurity class meets then.





96. I have to stay home and see if I snore.





97. I prefer to remain an enigma.





98. I think you want the OTHER [your name].





99. I have to sit up with a sick ant.





100. I%26#039;m trying to cut down.





101. My asthma is acting up again





102. That would interfere with my time to wait for the government to


take me away.





103. You%26#039;re ugly, I%26#039;m busy, have a nice day





104. Its my goldfish%26#039;s birthday





105. Uh, I have stuff to do.





106. I have to make an air sandwich





107. I have to hide the bodies.





108. I don%26#039;t have time to go on a date...with YOU!





109. I have to wash my hair.





110. I have to clean my toilet





111. I need to spend quality time with my weed wacker





112. I need to clean the air in my room





113. My hamster is having a heart transplant and I need to stay for


moral support.





114. I caught a rare deadly African disease that%26#039;s highly


contagious.





115. My gerbil is getting married.





116. I have plans to clean the cracks in my floor





117. Sorry, when you came to my door I mistook you for a mormon and


took cover.





118. I had to rob your house





119. That%26#039;s the night I reorganize my rock collection.





120. Pinnochio is on tonight





121. I have to try out for the ice skating team at school.





122. I don%26#039;t date outside my species





123. Sorry I think I%26#039;m gay





124. I have to go.......... .over.... ......... .there.





125. My butt is to big in this dress





126. I have to take out the trash





127. My dog had baby kittens.





128. I can%26#039;t, I need to take my computer apart and put it back


together.





129. I have to go shopping for my mother.





130. I%26#039;m sorry, I have to rotate the strings on all of my shoes.





131. No





132. I told my car I would tenderly rub wax into it%26#039;s body





133. I have to go for my full body wax appointment





134. I can%26#039;t I was asked to go to another party w/o you





135. I don%26#039;t date goats!





136. Ally Mcbeal is on





137. I%26#039;m reading with my widower





138. I have to brush my teeth.





139. Alf comes on soon





140. I%26#039;m sick.





141. I%26#039;ve had a better offer, some bloke is coming round to set fire


to my head





142. I%26#039;m busy cleaning the blood off my axe





143. My dad said I can%26#039;t date till I am married





144. I%26#039;m shaving my dog.





145. It%26#039;s against my religion to date people named (insert relevant


name)





146. My grandma is on fire.





147. I%26#039;m getting married tonight.





148. I%26#039;m engaged.





149. I don%26#039;t want to ruin our friendship.





150. I have family in town.





151. I just washed my hair.





152. It%26#039;s that time of the month again.





153. My father%26#039;s grandmother%26#039; s aunt%26#039;s mother died.





154. I have to take down the Christmas lights.





155. I have to go to a surprise party for my grandma%26#039;s birthday.





156. I left my tolerance in another coat.





157. I just got back together with my ex





158. I don%26#039;t like people.





159. I have to alphabetize my CDs. (Hey, is that supposed to be


insulting to me? -- dan)





160. I might see someone who knows me.





161. My brother%26#039;s sister%26#039;s mum%26#039;s son%26#039;s dad died.





162. I would, but it would be a complete waste of make-up.





163. My pet snake is constipated again.





164. I have a phobia of people named (insert name here).





165. I have to teach my pig to sing.





166. I just got sick (right after you asked me out).





167. My dog is too tired.





168. I never said I%26#039;d go out with you, that was my evil twin.





169. I would go out with you but my waiting list is full.





170. There%26#039;s a four hour TV special on trimming shrubbery.





171. I%26#039;m washing the sofa.





172. I have to milk my cow.





173. Everquest.





174. I don%26#039;t want to miss Martha Stewart%26#039;s premiere.





175. I have to teach my frog how to croak.





176. I%26#039;m too busy watching the paint dry.





177. The %26quot;Rocky%26quot; marathon is on that night.





178. I promised my mum I%26#039;d bathe the hamster.





179. I tripped over an ant and broke my leg.





180. I need to clip my nose hairs.





181. I have to read the labels on all of my food.





182. You are extremely unattractive. Sorry, someone had to tell you.





183. I%26#039;m gay.





184. I don%26#039;t like you.





185. My goat broke a horn.





186. I have to go to the dentist.





187. I have to brush my dog%26#039;s teeth.





188. I must go in search of my charms which were stolen by an angry


leprechaun.





189. I%26#039;m going to the moon.





190. My water wings are flat.





191. I have to stay home and give my goldfish a bath.





192. I%26#039;m going to be playing with my mental blocks.





193. I have to wax the driveway.





194. I%26#039;m not into dating right now.





195. I%26#039;m teaching my goldfish how to play the electric guitar.





196. I%26#039;m teaching my dog to meow.





197. I have to watch Oprah.





198. I like you, but my friends said I can%26#039;t go out with you.





199. I like your best friend.





200. I%26#039;m complicated to go out with.





201. I just found out we%26#039;re related.





202. On my list of things to do, seeing you is at the bottom.

Bad date excuses,long ones?
By God!! How much time do you have child? Enough to hear all those, I guess. 202!! My dear Lord!!
Reply:MANOFWORD???????????????? BE POLITE HONEY AND TELL THE TRUTH.......MANOFTOOMANYWORDS!... Report It

Reply:I%26#039;M SORRY, BUT, I GOT B O R E D AROUND #37!!! WHATEVER YOU DO...DO NOT PULL OUT THAT LIST TO REFER TO WHEN YOU%26#039;RE ON A DATE!!!! GEEZ, GIVE THE POOR GIRL A BRAKE!! OH, BY TH WAY, HAVE ALL THOSE EXCUSES BEEN USED ON YOU?? MMMMMMM, WONDER WHY!!!!! Report It

Reply:Is this a question or an answer with a %26quot;?%26quot; at the end?
Reply:are you feeling o.k? you must not have had anything to do to type all of this down!!
Reply:Holy Sh** dude were you bored or what?
Reply:Me Like! to all those people who say its to long, thats YOUR problem if you think its too long only read the first 20. I think the more the merrier.


203. I dont date people who wear white socks and yours are the whitist I have ever seen.


At first 117 insulted me as I am Mormon, but then I lightened up and decided it was all in good natured fun!
Reply:gave me a good laugh but 202 things thats a little ocd
Reply:It%26#039;s so long I didn%26#039;t finish reading it.


Are you doing this to see what answers you get?


Man you must be bored.
Reply:Boy you wasn%26#039;t lying about long huh? But what about this one





I have to count the wires on my TV....





They where funny
Reply:WOW HAVE SOMEONE USED ALL THEM ON YOU? YOU POOR DEAR:-(
Reply:This is tooooooo long!!!!!
Reply:Ok first step, next time narrow it down 2 the 1s pepl would realy do.
Reply:LOL! %26quot;Sorry I think i%26#039;m gay.%26quot; hahaha ^_^ Haha Nice! Every day of the week ends in Y.. ha Niiiiiiiccccccceeee!! lol
Reply:lmao %26quot;I told my car I%26#039;d tenderly rub wax into it%26#039;s body.%26quot;
Reply:youve wasted my and your time



myspace

What would you label me as?

I shop at hollister, abercrombie, aeropostale, and american eagle. I wear my hair down curly and sometimes straight. i have white adio shoes with skulls on them. i am a huge fan of afi and listen to panic! at the disco, flyleaf, 30 seconds to mars, hawthorne heights, nirvana, etc.

What would you label me as?
Someone who cares way too much about how others think about them. Believe it or not... after high school people stop caring what cliques you are in and who you hang out with. Just be yourself, shop where ever you want to and stop worrying about what other think about you. Its not worth the hardship nor your breath!
Reply:definitly PREP
Reply:um...pretty average (no offense, I mean that in a good way)





diverse in your thinking and tastes, not conforming to any one way of thinking.
Reply:Someone who I would not like to spend time with
Reply:prepish.. but thats not necessarily bad. i shop at all those places too :) hollister pwns lol
Reply:Preppy


I dress in the to!
Reply:unique, just like everyone else
Reply:unique
Reply:You sound like a prep. (Not that that%26#039;s a bad thing.)
Reply:Maybe alternative.
Reply:Preppie-look-a-like, and spending WAY too much of your parents%26#039; money on your wardrobe. Try spending more of your allowance on music and books, and you may find that what you wear doesn%26#039;t make you who you are--it%26#039;s what%26#039;s in your head that matters.
Reply:prep trying to be an punk


i dont know
Reply:like me.haha.welcome to your teenage years where you hate to not fit in but to fit in, its a whole lot of work. goooood luck!
Reply:PREP.
Reply:I would label you as a teenager. have fun and dont worry about a label so much.
Reply:you think ur cool but not really!!!
Reply:A Teenager! ;)
Reply:Hmmmm.....we call that prep. Do me a favor and dye your hair black and straight, go to hot topic and buy some big black baggy jeans, wear black shirts under a hoody and then the shoes you already discribed and you%26#039;ll be hot. Every girl I know loves the emo goth boy look. Also, try eyeliner.
Reply:well, i would guess that all your friends do exactly the same thing, i would label you as wool.



viruses

Is my amp messed up or what?

Ok i have a JL audio 500/1 monoblock amp on 2 Dual voice coil 12 inch memphis m3%26#039;s. The amp is maybe 4 months old and ever since i%26#039;ve had it, it has played excellent until now. Now everything plays good and hits hard except after a few minutes later the subs stop playing, a few seconds later they come back off but then stop again. This continues until i turn the bass down all the way.. I checked the amp while this happened and an orange light flashed. Labeled under the light was Low and a horse shoe looking thing which i think is ohms. I have 4 gauge hot wire, its grounded good, everything seems to be correct... Could this be my subs going bad? Please help!

Is my amp messed up or what?
you%26#039;re probably running your amplifier under 1.5ohms
Reply:its unlikely memphis are good speakers um if ur amp and your speakers are different impedence it might cause this aka 4 ohm 2 ohm
Reply:no1 cares
Reply:well,if u checked all the wires,and everything seems proper,try turning the filter on low pass,or is it already on that?
Reply:how well do you have it ventilated, if you havew it stuffed unbder a seat or covered by crap the MOS FET might be kicking in cuz ur amp is getting hot. ventilate it better
Reply:your ohms are too low and lick meup the anus is a FU!*ING FAG sorry had to say that



diseases

Whats my label?

Ok I was wondering if you guys can figure out my label.


I am Childish yea and I like cartoons. I like music genres of teen pop, Dj and pop punk. My all time favorite artists are Crazy Frog, Jump 5 and Blink 182. I hate romance. I tell almost everything about what i think to my parents. I dont know how to play any instruments yet. I am jus practicing Keyboard and hope to be great soon. Avaerage in studies. I do not take any drugs,drink or smoke. About how I dress. I got no piercings at all and I dont put on any neckless well i keep nothing at all and then I put on sports shoes, Black jeans pants, T-shirts of colour green,yellow,red,black or blue and little spiky hair not straight up though. And mm I try to impress others. So mm ok now whats my label. Juss let me know my label noe ok.

Whats my label?
a geek?


emo? (whatever that is)


a regular kid (what ever that is = ) )
Reply:Not really enough to go on, i would say just a person,but i guess ur a punk,prep,nerd,or no body
Reply:Do you really need a label?
Reply:ur a kid!
Reply:your label? Generation Next, I think.
Reply:no offense but that is a turd sandwich label for u
Reply:Why would you want to limit yourself to a label?



myspace

Do you know the Answer?

Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that state :%26#039;Caution: May Cause Drowsiness?








You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them?

Do you know the Answer?
The same reason that hair dryers say %26quot;do not use in shower%26quot; - Because most people are stupid.





That would be up to the matre%26#039;d or host/hostess. Restaurants can deny service to anyone, even if the reasons were not posted.
Reply:1) Probably for the same reason why childrens%26#039; medication says %26quot;Do no opperate vehicles or heavy machinery while on this product.%26quot;


2) They would only serve them if they were a Disney character. Yes, I am talking to you Donald and Pouh-Bear.
Reply:guess people dont really read meds instructions


even when i go to pharmacy to get my meds....instruction on bottle says%26quot;Take By Mouth%26quot;...no duh....what do they think...im that dumb and gonna take them by ear!!??





guess they need a new sign...no shirt,no shoes,no pants no service.....
Reply:Haaaaa love it!
Reply:Haha cause theyre dum



maintenance repairs

Looking for some funky ladies shoes?

looking for something abit different 50%26#039;s styles maybe.


wiling to spend about £50,anyone know any labels i could look up

Looking for some funky ladies shoes?
stilleto heels were are very 50%26#039;s. especially peep toes.


this is a good website that tells you about the types of shoes worn in the 50%26#039;s.


http://www.fiftiesweb.com/fashion/fashio...





these are really cute and are from topshop


http://www.topshop.com/webapp/wcs/stores...





if you%26#039;re looking for shoes, i%26#039;d recommend ASOS.com - the shoes are really varied and their clothes are great too. they also have lots of celebrity look a like things.


other good places for shoes include:


www.barratts.co.uk


www.dolcis.co.uk


www.additionsdirect.co.uk





if you%26#039;re looking for something %26#039;different%26#039; how about a court shoe with a slight platform. or if you wanna be very different how about something a little more outrageous like these:


http://www.asos.com/Peaches-Geldof/Asos/...


i didn%26#039;t like them at first, but they%26#039;ve really grown on me!
Reply:schuh
Reply:Some of the best and most fashionable shoes are at the sites I listed. Good Luck!
Reply:go to http://www.piperlime.com





they have the BEST shoes evurr.


not even kidding.
Reply:schuh, faith


try cheap shops in Bullring Birmingham (UK), the Pallasades and in the city centre, shops like Garage shoes, Jonathon James are really cheap and great!!!
Reply:Look on ebay- my roomie is really into one of a kind, vintage looking shoes and gets great deals on ebay all the time!
Reply:Aldo Shoes all the way!! Lovley and very high!! Painfull @ the end of a night but as the saying goes beauty is pain!!!
Reply:How about this one:





www.funkyshoes.org.uk/
Reply:www.interpunk.com
Reply:Charlotte Russe





Wet Seal



motorcycles

Which of these high heel pumps can be labeled as regular or irregular Mary Janes?

A) %26gt;http://us.lrd.yahoo.com/_ylt=Al26yq34pKK...


B)%26gt;http://us.lrd.yahoo.com/_ylt=AlR0po6X97u...


C) http://us.lrd.yahoo.com/_ylt=Am8veiU0NJl...


D)http://us.lrd.yahoo.com/_ylt=AjneLiI8loI...


E) http://us.lrd.yahoo.com/_ylt=AjEANXJ5Pju...





IMO, all of these pumps would be labeled as Mary Janes, regardless of their styles.

Which of these high heel pumps can be labeled as regular or irregular Mary Janes?
sorry but NONE of them could be labeled Mary Janes. those shoes are just stillettos
Reply:yea any shoe reguardless of the size heal. would b a maryjane only if the shoe comes half way up the top of ur foot with a strap, then there consider maryjanes.
Reply:i think D
Reply:anythin that has a strap across is a Mary Jane especially the ones that looks like a doll shoes.
Reply:Mary Janes shoes are just mary janes shoes. The style regardless of colours are always the same. Its just Mary Janes and brand names like LV carries them as well as normal ordinary shoe shops. I%26#039;ve never heard of a regular or irregular Mary Janes.
Reply:Mary Janes r nice but i stick 2 sneakers and flip flops



credot siosse

Solving percentage problems?

The final cost of your new shoes $107.69. The local sales tax rate is 6.2%.What was the labeled (pre tax) price?

Solving percentage problems?
The tax, written as a decimal rather than a %, is 0.062





If the original price is P, then


P x 1.062 = 107.69


Divide 107.69 by 1.062 to get your answer.





Or,


P + (P x 0.062) = 107.69





Either way, your answer should come out to be $101.40
Reply:let x be the labeled price.





x+ x(6.2/100) = 107.69


x(1+ 0.062) = 107.69


1.062x=107.69


x= 107.69/1.062 ~=101.403



myspace quizzes

What do you think of this story?I Really need feedback!?

In calculus, I was under my own storm cloud. My eyes studied the ridges of my black sneakers,as I dared not to look up at any potential ridiculer. I never liked being in this class-let alone at this whole institution of Golden Valley High; a place scattered with the people that level the kook in black to the gum on the bottom of their shoe. It%26#039;s bad enough that even my name labeled me a freak, like a big, prominent stamp across my forehead. Only, a certain burden was my own stamp.





I don%26#039;t have the stereotype of a freak because of my deviating appearance or even my name; it%26#039;s because I have, what you might say is a extraordinary flaw. It involves a wand, and a broomstick as my defect.





I could still remember when the power erupted from me the first time. I was 15. I cried uncontrolably in my pillow, feeling the damp cotton against my cheek. My stomach ached, while I continued to sob in small bursts.





Then, Alex and her equally beautiful followers manicured hands pulling at my stringy hair and their mean words,crowded around me like well groomed wolves around fresh meat. Their hungry eyes flashed with greed, hoping to feed off the meat of my ego...





A knock vanished Alex and those beautiful girls, and I found myself back in my room. I once again felt the moisture of the pillowcase against my cheek.





%26quot;Ziadora? Are you in there?%26quot;, my mother asked, as she fidgeted with her pearls.





%26quot; Go away!%26quot; I replied, sniffing back a couple of tears.





Even behind my bedroom door, I could picture her irritated face.





%26quot; Zia, I%26#039;m not in the mood for this. What%26#039;s wrong with you now?%26quot;





%26quot; Nothing Mom! Just go away. I just need to be alone right now!%26quot;





%26quot;Then why are you sniffing?%26quot;, my mother asked.





%26quot;I SAID GO AWAY!%26quot;





I feel a weird sensation speeding up my arms into my hands. Then, In a automatic movement, webs of golden light rushed out of the tips of my fingers, blasting away the door that my mother stood behind. The door, along with my mother fell backward and slammed onto the wooden floor. For a brief moment, I was in disbelief, wondering if this just happened or if I was turning insane. Then fear overpowered me. I immediately ran to my mother . She was unconscious, but she looked so peaceful, and so still.





I pulled the door off her, and I shook her, hoping to God she wasn%26#039;t dead.





%26quot; Mom. Mom! Please wake up.%26quot;





She remained still.





%26quot;MOM! Please! Please don%26#039;t be dead!%26quot;





New tears ran down my face, as I continued to shake her. I couldn%26#039;t have the only person who loved me to die I just couldn%26#039;t. I don%26#039;t know what I would do...





I continued to scream, %26quot;MOM! Oh my God-%26quot;

















All of a sudden, A paper ball slammed against my head, throwing me back into my 17 year old self. I finally looked up, and saw that Mr Parr was scribbling notes while explaining Derivatives. Then I turned around, wondering who threw it. When I realized who it was, I immediately turned around, trying my hardest to avoid the stare of Alex Johnson.





Alex Johnson is what I call a rich and beautiful prototype of a *****. She, and followers are the main contributors of the venomous words and taunting of not only me, but other teens also who doesn%26#039;t have the traits of beauty. They try so hard to bring me down, I feel myself shrinking smaller and smaller until I meet their perfectly manicured feet. I have to admit that their plan is nearly successful.





Anyways, I tried to look away from her eyes, but she caught it and pulled me in with her malevolent smirk. After she seen me, all hell broke loose.





As her eyes sparkled with evil only a few others and I could decode, she whispered, %26quot;What are you looking at freak?%26quot;





Her followers and a couple others snickered in laughter, as my face flushed in deep red. Alex continued to smirk in that malevolent way of hers, and I wanted nothing more right now than to punch her in her lacquered mouth.





After my reply of hesitant silence, she repeated in mock wonder, %26quot;I said, what are you looking at freak?%26quot;





Then she threw another balled up piece of paper at me. Her followers and the few others that overheard continued to chuckle, as Alex smirked in satisfaction. My anger began to build up in pulsating rage, and I picked up the paper ball and squeezed it with all my might. Then, I felt the webs escaping from my fingers. I felt the paper ball morph into a jagged rock, and my lack of control caused me to turn around and throw the jagged rock into her bronzed face. Fear in Alex%26#039;s eyes transformed into a scream of vain,covering her previously rosy left cheek that was now a circle of raw flesh with her hands. Then, she collasped on the ground, still clutching her left cheek.





Everyone-including Alex, her silicone followers, and the rest of the class looked at me not in disgust, but in fear for once. The 3 girls began to surround and confort Alex, and Bella, the suck up of the clique, tried to absorb and wipe off the blood flowing down her cheek with a handerchief. Mr. Parr, previously writing down notes on the chalkboard and oblivious of this incident going on behind him, turned to face the class and looked around.





Seeing Alex%26#039;s shock and my flushed rage, he shouted, %26quot; Ziadora, what%26#039;s going on?%26quot;





My voice choked up from brief shame and nervousness, and I stuttered, %26quot;I-I t-thr-%26quot;





%26quot;You what?%26quot; he asked again, his voice becomming more demanding.





%26quot; She threw that jagged rock in my face!%26quot;





He moved his eyes to Alex%26#039;s direction, and her gouged cheek and her bloody appearance filled his vision.





%26quot;Zia, did you do this?%26quot;, he asked quietly.








Guiltily, I nodded in reply.





Then his eyes widened , and his voice rose in anger as he said, %26quot; Zia, get your things and go to the office right now! %26quot;





Then he walked over to where Alex was sitting, and helped her up.





I desperately wanted to explain why this whole situation happened in the first place, but I decided against it. Instead, I gathered up my things and calmly walked out of the classroom.





As I headed down to the Principal%26#039;s office, I felt a bit content for the first time in years. For a moment, I felt afraid of what was going to happen when I got to the Principal%26#039;s office. Eventhough it%26#039;s a very likely chance that I%26#039;ll face suspension, I never felt so good hurting someone before in my life. The last time I had one of these outbursts, I felt a overload of shame and guilt because I thought that my mother, one of the few people that I loved, was dead. However, my mother has never been better now, and hate is all I feel for Alex. Just seeing her fall off her high chair of arrogance made my day for the first time in months.

What do you think of this story?I Really need feedback!?
Some grammatical errors, which don%26#039;t help at all. Some of the dialog is a bit off kilter- not very believable sounding such as %26quot;She threw that jagged rock in my face!%26quot;. Now, if someone had just hit you in the face with a jagged rock and the teacher asked you what happened would you say %26quot;She threw a jagged rock in my face!%26quot;? Would anyone? Have you examined the rock at that point to know its jagged? Would the teacher care that it was jagged? Just going back to a simpler %26quot;She threw a rock in my face%26quot; would be somewhat less forced sounding. It seems almost like you are sitting there with a thesaurus, trying to come up with as many adjectives as possible, to be honest with you.
Reply:In my opinion i thk is good.im not a good writer myself but the whole expression was clear.enjoyed reading it..
Reply:I thought it was great I didn%26#039;t understand some of the words but that could be my ignorance. any how I would love to read the whole thing when you are done.




horses for loan

Econ help!!!?

A shoe company in the United States is examining the relationship between sales and advertising. Sales measures the number of pairs of shoes sold in various months. Advertising measures the amount of money spent on TV commercials in the same months. The company%26#039;s economist will graph this relationship, given the information provided by the company.





Which of the following would be an appropriate label for a variable on one axis on this graph?





Dollars





B. Pairs of shoes per month





C. Sales





D. Minutes





E. Months

Econ help!!!?
The company is providing only two figures for each month:


(x) the dollars spent on TV commercial advertising for each month for several months


and,


(y) the pair of shoes sold each month for the same several months.


So, the economist will have n paired observation (xi, yi) i= 1, 2, ....., n. He will plot these figures on the graph first to see if there is apparently any relation between x and y in the sense of whether high value x is associated with high values of y. If the cluster points on the graph does suggest some correlation, he/she can then try to have a best fit curve drawn/ estimated with the standard statistical method like least squares regression or second degree curve fitting.


The economist may label the X-axis as the Advertising Spend ( measured by dollars spent on TV ads) and Y-axis as Sales Quantity (measured by no. of pairs of shoes sold).


Labels like months or minutes or dollars will not do. Labelling sales may be confusing because sales can be expressed both in terms of value and quantity. For clarity, he should use the label no. of pairs of shoes sold or Sales quantity.


Greater the clarity in labelling the better is for the readers to understand easily. Communication should not be in confusing or imprecise manner.



visualarts

How About a Little Redneck Etiquette......?

Redneck Etiquette





Just when you think you%26#039;ve heard it all.








1. Never take a beer to a job interview.





2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.





3.It%26#039;s considered tacky to take a cooler to church.





4. If you have to vacuum the bed it%26#039;s time to change sheets.





5. Even if you%26#039;re CERTAIN that you are included in the will ... it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral.











DINING OUT











1. When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup and pour slowly so as not to %26quot;bruise%26quot; the fruit of the vine.





2. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.











ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME











1. A centerpiece for the table should NEVER be prepared by a taxidermist.





2. Do NOT allow the dog to eat at the table . . . no matter how good his manners are.











PERSONAL HYGIENE











1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one%26#039;s OWN truck keys.





2. Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of money.





3. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as it tends to detract from a woman%26#039;s jewelry and alter the taste of finger foods.











DATING (OUTSIDE THE FAMILY)











1. Always offer to bait your date%26#039;s hook, especially on the first date.





2. Be aggressive. Let her know you%26#039;re interested: %26quot;I%26#039;ve been wantin%26#039; to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago....%26quot;





3. Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; others might say %26quot;Monday.%26quot; If the latter is the answer it is the man%26#039;s responsibility to get her to school on time.











THEATER ETIQUETTE











1. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up as soon as the movie has ended.





2. Refrain from talking to characters on the screen. Tests have proven they cannot hear you.











WEDDINGS











1. Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift.





2. Kissing the bride for more than five seconds may get you shot.





3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cumberbund and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance.





4. Though uncomfortable, say %26quot;yes%26quot; to socks and shoes for this special occasion.











DRIVING ETIQUETTE











1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles; even if the gun is loaded, and the deer is in sight.





2. When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires ALWAYS has the right of way.





3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.





4. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer too.





5. Do NOT lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.

How About a Little Redneck Etiquette......?
HaHaHa! Loved the driving etiquette!


Many stars to you!
Reply:hahahaha that%26#039;s funny
Reply:lol thats good
Reply:ha ha ha that%26#039;s funny!@





THanks for the laugh!@



visual arts

What type of shoes are these/ what style?

I bought a pair of BabyCham shoes/converse a few months ago and I haven%26#039;t worn them since as I changed my style, they look to %26quot;scene%26quot; which I can%26#039;t stand! I know it%26#039;s just a style and I shouldn%26#039;t label people but...


What do you think of the shoes, should I give them to a charity shop or something, I really don%26#039;t want to have wasted my money.


Thanks





http://www.amazon.co.uk/Babycham-Womens-...





They are the same buckle design but they a multi-colour star pattern instead of the little shapes.

What type of shoes are these/ what style?
they are totaly awsome shoes and if worn with the right outfit they wouldnt look scene!
Reply:they%26#039;re alright, a bit tacky if i do say so myself . but again if you wear them in the right way, they could be well cool :)
Reply:i wear rocket dog shoes alot and always fear they look a bit %26#039;scene%26#039; but i just wear them with jeans and a top and they look fine. as long as your not overloading on the scene style in the rest of your outfit then no one will even notice.





if you want to sell then put them on ebay x
Reply:I%26#039;m not sure really what what you should wear with them but I definatly reccomend keeping onto them!! In year or so%26#039;s time you%26#039;ll probably regret letting them go! It happens to me all the time!
Reply:sell them on e-bay
Reply:If you really don%26#039;t like them, why don%26#039;t you keep them for when you%26#039;re doing something that needs work clothes like in the garden, decorating, painting or involving mud?





They look pretty inoffensive to me.
Reply:Those shoes are really cute. If you spent a lot of money you should NOT give them away or sell them. You%26#039;ll just loose money. Just because they have a lot of color doesn%26#039;t make them scene... wear them, I bet they%26#039;d look cute with some nice pants and a tank top. You liked them a few months ago, which means you must still like them, but try to act like you don%26#039;t because they fit into a style you don%26#039;t like.
Reply:Give them to me lol
Reply:i think you could do an 80%26#039;s style with these with leggings and a long dress or shirt. or try a bright or black top with a denim skirt and leggings. definitely save them for an 80s party - you will be kicking yourself if you get invited to one and don%26#039;t have any shoes.
Reply:this outfit is really cute..


there is 2 here ..


one is kinda rock-ish/trendy and the other is.. i dont know how to describe it...





hope you like it....


http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=11381...





p.s i love those shoes... i have them :)
Reply:why not sell them on 121bid.com is is a 100% free auction site, or advertise them in your local free ads.





What size are they?
Reply:THOSE ARE ADORABLE yeah just a teeeeny bit scene, but i%26#039;m a prep and i%26#039;d wear them. may i steal them from you?



tanning

Since when are Redwing Brand Boots made in China?

Did I spot a pair of impersonators? Yes, I am aware that RedWing shoe company owns other brands that are made overseas(e.g. WORX). But... a boot sold under the Red Wing label?!?!!!

Since when are Redwing Brand Boots made in China?
real Redwings are still made in the US, so yes you probably saw a boot under their label
Reply:Its all about corporate profit. Many company%26#039;s are outsourcing their products. They don%26#039;t care about American Jobs they just want American Cash. Its hard to find anything made today that has not been outsourced. Rocky Boots was once made in Ohio with local labour. Now they only sell their outsourced boots in Ohio at the same place they were once made. I have no doubt that Redwing has followed the rest in this mass exodus of American Jobs. If you bought a Nike shoe for say $120.00 it was made for $1.20 somewhere in China. The same shoe here would have cost $20.00 to make. Because of higher labour, EPA, Taxes.



poems

Person to answer the most of these questions (or all) wins 10 points?

don%26#039;t say something like %26quot;you have too much time on your hands%26quot; i found this on the internet and simply copied and pasted it, you can tell i didn%26#039;t type it all because it%26#039;s far more than 1000 characters, whoever can answer the most or if it%26#039;s possible ALL these questions will earn 10 points and most importantly, my respect


BEGIN :)








What%26#039;s the difference between a novel and a book?


How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?


If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it?


If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth?


If you have a cold hot pocket, is it just a pocket?


If humans evolved from monkey%26#039;s/apes, why are they still here?


Why doesn%26#039;t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?


Why is the show called unsolved mysteries? if they were solved they wouldn%26#039;t be mysteries.


Do penguins have knees?


Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?








How come people tell you not to stand in front of an emergency exit when if there was an emergency surely you would run through it?


Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway?


In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?


Why are both of Spongebob%26#039;s parents round like sea sponges while he is square like a kitchen sponge?


Does a two-humped camel store more water than a one-humped camel?


If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk?


Why is it that if someone yells %26quot;duck%26quot; they are helping you, but if they yell %26quot;chicken%26quot; they are insulting you?


If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?


If they have angel food cake on earth, do they have people food cake in heaven?


If you fart and burp at the same time, would it make a vacuum in your tummy?


Do they call a fortune teller who cant see a %26quot;blind seer%26quot;?


Why do you put two cents in when its only a penny for your thoughts?


Can you cry underwater?


You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them?


If an African elephant comes to America, is it an African-American elephant?


Why doesn%26#039;t flavored gum turn your mouth that color?


If a doctor suddenly died while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?


Why do we sing %26quot;Rock a bye baby%26quot; to lull our little ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground?


Why do we say we%26#039;re head over heels when we%26#039;re happy? Isn%26#039;t that the way we normally are?


If the Wicked Witch of the West melts in water... how did she ever bathe?


If bald people work as chefs in a restaurant,do they have to wear hairnets?


Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that state :%26#039;Caution: May Cause Drowsiness?


Do nudists have pin-ups of people with clothes on?


How can Darth Vader breathe and talk at the same time?


If there%26#039;s a wheelchair-bound comedian, is it still called %26quot;stand-up%26quot;?


When the French swear do they say pardon my English?


Do people who use sign language see little hands in their head when they think about what somebody said, or do they hear the words in their head?


How did Walt Disney figure out how to make people pay to stand in lines all day?


Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?


Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?


Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?


Why do they call someone %26quot;late%26quot; if they died early?


Why are the adjectives %26#039;fast as%26#039; and %26#039;slow as%26#039; often used in conjunction with hell, is hell slow or fast?


If the serving size on a can of soda is one can, then why is the serving size on the little can one can, too? Wouldn%26#039;t the little cans be 2 cans?


If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family?


Why are red buttons always the most important?


How is chess considered a sport?


Why is it when your sleeping it`s called drool but when your awake its called spit?


If a hermaphrodite got sent to a certain gender prison, which one would it get sent to?


If a teacher were to teach a younger grade than they were teaching before, would they be %26quot;degraded%26quot;?


If you get chemo-therapy do you lose your pubic hairs?


Would you die if you didn%26#039;t pee?


Why does every Abraham Lincoln impersonator sound the same, even though there are no known audio recordings of the man?


How%26#039;s come people tell you to stay a kid for as long as you can. Yet the moment you do anything childish or immature they tell you to grow up.


Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don%26#039;t lay eggs.


When Jewish People go to Court, they can%26#039;t swear on the bible, can they?


If marbles are not made of marble, why are they called marbles?


If you dig a hole through the center of the earth, come out on the other side, and then let go, would you be falling down or floating up?


Could you be a closet claustrophobic?


Could someone be addicted to counseling? If so, how would you treat them?


If ketchup is good on french fries, how come it isn%26#039;t good on mashed potatoes?


Where do all the daylight savings hours go?


Why doesn%26#039;t the hair on your arms grow as fast as the hair on your head?


What happens if a black cat walks under a ladder and breaks a mirror?


Why when people ask you %26quot;what three things would you bring with you on a desert island?%26quot; no one ever replies, %26quot;A BOAT%26quot;


Why are elderly people often called %26quot;old people%26quot; but children are never called %26quot;new people%26quot;?


How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt?


Why doesn%26#039;t broccoli come in a can?


Can you slam a revolving door?


How young can you be, but still die of old age?


What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover under a ladder?


Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils?


Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?


If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons?


What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get Well card?


Can you read a picture book?


Why does it say %26quot;shake well%26quot; on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets?


Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?


Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?


Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol? I mean..really could we save that many people by getting those darn five year-olds with headcolds off those forklifts!


If mirrors need light to work, what happens if you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror?


if you%26#039;re on an American airline, and you land in Canada and stay on the plane, is the drinking age still 21 or does it change to 19?


What happens if every team in the NFL goes 8-8?


What shape is the sky?


If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead?


Why is it written %26quot;May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts%26quot; on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves?


If you only have one eye...are you blinking or winking?


If you have a gun and you ask, %26quot;can I ask you a question?%26quot; and they say %26quot;fire away%26quot; should you shoot them?


What is a chickpea if it is neither a chick nor a pea?


Why is it called the People%26#039;s Republic Of China when China%26#039;s not a republic?

Person to answer the most of these questions (or all) wins 10 points?
Here you go, have fun.





What%26#039;s the difference between a novel and a book? a book can be about anything, like an instructional book, or a picture book but a novel is a storey.





How old are you before it can be said you died of old age? 72





If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it? Yes





If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth? Probably not





If you have a cold hot pocket, is it just a pocket? No, it%26#039;s a cold hot -pocket





If humans evolved from monkey%26#039;s/apes, why are they still here? Evolution is a lie, we were created by God





Why doesn%26#039;t glue stick to the inside of the bottle? Moisture, because it can%26#039;t fully stick until it%26#039;s dry





Why is the show called unsolved mysteries? if they were solved they wouldn%26#039;t be mysteries. Robert Stack works for the department of redundancy department.





Do penguins have knees? Yes, tiny short knees





Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?








How come people tell you not to stand in front of an emergency exit when if there was an emergency surely you would run through it? No one%26#039;s ever told me that.





Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway? Sally is six and is not a savy business woman yet. She%26#039;s still learning.





In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section? Neither, in reference.





Why are both of Spongebob%26#039;s parents round like sea sponges while he is square like a kitchen sponge? His mom was sleeping around.





Does a two-humped camel store more water than a one-humped camel? No, two small humps hold the same amount as one big hump.





If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk? No.





Why is it that if someone yells %26quot;duck%26quot; they are helping you, but if they yell %26quot;chicken%26quot; they are insulting you? Duck is being used as a verb and most verbs aren%26#039;t offensive, while chicken is saying something about your qualities





If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it? If it turns out you%26#039;re innocent they should, and if you%26#039;re not that%26#039;s ok because your new home is at the prison and you don%26#039;t have to worry about that door, it%26#039;s the least of your problems.





If they have angel food cake on earth, do they have people food cake in heaven? No.





If you fart and burp at the same time, would it make a vacuum in your tummy? maybe but it would be so small it would be insignificant.





Do they call a fortune teller who cant see a %26quot;blind seer%26quot;?


No, if you can see the future you don%26#039;t use your eyes





Why do you put two cents in when its only a penny for your thoughts? Because people love to give their opinion twice as much as asking for an opinion





Can you cry underwater? Yes





You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them? Not if they have the %26quot;we reserve the right to refuse service to anyone%26quot; sign too.





If an African elephant comes to America, is it an African-American elephant? No just African elephant.





Why doesn%26#039;t flavored gum turn your mouth that color? Blue gumballs do.





If a doctor suddenly died while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient? They bring in another set of doctors to work on them both and if they get the sergon up and runing quicker, he can continue.





Why do we sing %26quot;Rock a bye baby%26quot; to lull our little ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground? Parents aren%26#039;t perfect.





Why do we say we%26#039;re head over heels when we%26#039;re happy? Isn%26#039;t that the way we normally are? yes, but when you%26#039;re sad you slouch and you%26#039;re head isn%26#039;t over your heels anymore.





If the Wicked Witch of the West melts in water... how did she ever bathe? She didn%26#039;t





If bald people work as chefs in a restaurant,do they have to wear hairnets? Not if they are completely bald.





Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that state :%26#039;Caution: May Cause Drowsiness? Because people out there sue over crap like that.





Do nudists have pin-ups of people with clothes on? No.





How can Darth Vader breathe and talk at the same time? Some people can. Like some jazz musicians can breath in their nose and blow out their mouth to play a trumpet.





If there%26#039;s a wheelchair-bound comedian, is it still called %26quot;stand-up%26quot;? Yeah, he%26#039;s %26quot;up%26quot; in front of an audience so yeah.





When the French swear do they say pardon my English? Nope, they don%26#039;t care.





Do people who use sign language see little hands in their head when they think about what somebody said, or do they hear the words in their head? If they had hearing at one time they may hear the words, but most likely they recall the conversation and see the person and their signs, just like you can recall a person talking to you and invisioning them saying the words.





How did Walt Disney figure out how to make people pay to stand in lines all day? Hype. All hype.





Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? They%26#039;re right, if you wait long enough things will materialize in your fridge.





Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Transformation not only changes the object but the color too.





Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Human nature.





Why do they call someone %26quot;late%26quot; if they died early? I think they call them late no matter if they died early or late or whenever.





Why are the adjectives %26#039;fast as%26#039; and %26#039;slow as%26#039; often used in conjunction with hell, is hell slow or fast? Hell is multipurpose, it could also mean cold as in %26quot;cold as hell%26quot; it%26#039;s a word to use when you don%26#039;t know what else to use to compare something to.





If the serving size on a can of soda is one can, then why is the serving size on the little can one can, too? Wouldn%26#039;t the little cans be 2 cans? If you%26#039;re half as thirsty a half a can will serve as a serving.





If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family? A queen, of course (unless he%26#039;s the more dominate one then he can be the king and the other can be the queen.





Why are red buttons always the most important? The human eye notices red quickly and red often signifies danger or off limits. It%26#039;s pretty universal.





How is chess considered a sport? it%26#039;s a sport of the mind.





Why is it when your sleeping it`s called drool but when your awake its called spit? it%26#039;s not, it%26#039;s drool if it runs out of your mouth, awake or asleep, and spit is a noun but is made by the action of spit or spitting.





If a hermaphrodite got sent to a certain gender prison, which one would it get sent to? No one cares.





If a teacher were to teach a younger grade than they were teaching before, would they be %26quot;degraded%26quot;? degraded is a subjective term, so you would have to ask them how they feel about it.





If you get chemo-therapy do you lose your pubic hairs? Yes, and eyebrows too.





Would you die if you didn%26#039;t pee? possibly.





Why does every Abraham Lincoln impersonator sound the same, even though there are no known audio recordings of the man?


I think everyone invisions a man over 6%26#039; 4%26quot; to talk in a deep voice like that.





How%26#039;s come people tell you to stay a kid for as long as you can. Yet the moment you do anything childish or immature they tell you to grow up. Usually the person or persons who make statement 1 aren%26#039;t always the same that make statement 2.





Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don%26#039;t lay eggs. The root word of Easter has to do with being fertle and eggs and birth, you should google it for complete history of Easter.





When Jewish People go to Court, they can%26#039;t swear on the bible, can they? They CAN,the question is what does it mean.





If marbles are not made of marble, why are they called marbles? The swirling marks inside are like that of marble. and possibly at one time maybe they were made from marble, I don%26#039;t know.





If you dig a hole through the center of the earth, come out on the other side, and then let go, would you be falling down or floating up? YOu would fall back down to the center.





Could you be a closet claustrophobic? Yes.





Could someone be addicted to counseling? If so, how would you treat them? Why would they need to be treated for it?





If ketchup is good on french fries, how come it isn%26#039;t good on mashed potatoes? Have you tried it? Then how would you know?





Where do all the daylight savings hours go? it evens out.





Why doesn%26#039;t the hair on your arms grow as fast as the hair on your head? Intelligent design: God knew it would s-ck for us if all our hair grew like that.





What happens if a black cat walks under a ladder and breaks a mirror? He%26#039;s fine but looses his 7 lives.





Why when people ask you %26quot;what three things would you bring with you on a desert island?%26quot; no one ever replies, %26quot;A BOAT%26quot;


Most folks want to stay and make a vacation out of it and bring along three comforts fot the stay.





Why are elderly people often called %26quot;old people%26quot; but children are never called %26quot;new people%26quot;? Well maybe we should start.





How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt? It%26#039;s just gloves thy%26#039;re not attached, he can take them off.





Why doesn%26#039;t broccoli come in a can? Nobody eats it as it is, why go through the trouble of putting it in a can.





Can you slam a revolving door? Yes, it will do no good.





How young can you be, but still die of old age? Didn%26#039;t you already ask this?





What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover under a ladder? Enter from one side, get the clover and then back up so you don%26#039;t actually pass all the way under it.





Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils? no and no.





Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? yeah you asked this one already too.





If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons? It%26#039;s more fun that way, besides he wasn%26#039;t that civilized, he didn%26#039;t ever wear pants.





What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get Well card? Hopefully you don%26#039;t get an infection.





Can you read a picture book? yes.





Why does it say %26quot;shake well%26quot; on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets? it is usually so thick it doesn%26#039;t need shaking except to expel it from the bottle.





Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? The second tTuesday of every other month.





Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism? only if you eat her upper half.





Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol? I mean..really could we save that many people by getting those darn five year-olds with headcolds off those forklifts! Child labor is cruel.





If mirrors need light to work, what happens if you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror? You will be able to see yourself since the goggles amplify the available light.





if you%26#039;re on an American airline, and you land in Canada and stay on the plane, is the drinking age still 21 or does it change to 19? It stays 21.





What happens if every team in the NFL goes 8-8? We all laugh then cry.





What shape is the sky? spherical-ish.





If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead? This one is a reapeat.





Why is it written %26quot;May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts%26quot; on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves? Once again, people sue over these kinds of things so yes, it has to be on there.





If you only have one eye...are you blinking or winking? just blinking.





If you have a gun and you ask, %26quot;can I ask you a question?%26quot; and they say %26quot;fire away%26quot; should you shoot them? well you could shoot other stuff, not just them.





What is a chickpea if it is neither a chick nor a pea? I can%26#039;t judge something I have no knowledge of.





Why is it called the People%26#039;s Republic Of China when China%26#039;s not a republic? It just sounded good.





Ok I missed one, so what?
Reply:Great question%26#039;s, some I%26#039;ve asked myself... Alot these are the on%26#039;es that make ya go Hmmmmmm.
Reply:a novel is a story and book could be like infomation





till you have wrinkles


legally the might have to show the movie.


no they would just earn the surface.





we only involed from a certain breed of monkey the others are different breeds.





glue doesn%26#039;t stick to the inside because there is no air there.





because they start off as unsolved mysteries





no penguins don%26#039;t have kness.





its called going off because thats the idea going behind it to turn it off.


because ur not block the exsit


because its a tounge twister


they don%26#039;t put the bible in either


because he has square pants


no they would store the same


no you don%26#039;t get spoiled milk.


because chicken means ur scared and duck doesn%26#039;t
Reply:Are u token from South Park?
Reply:way too long and involved for me


tired !!
Reply:What%26#039;s the difference between a novel and a book? a novel is a story that is in move seqennce. a book can be anything with paper in it.


How old are you before it can be said you died of old age? You die of old age when you just die for no reason.


If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it? Yes, people might come late.


If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth? No you need to buy that separtely
Reply:just went blind, sorry
Reply:haha agree with tristan29 above me
Reply:if someone owns a peice of land they do not own it too deep down; the rest belongs to the government.








All done
Reply:WAY 2 much work for 10 points... i%26#039;ll just take my 2 thank u very much!
Reply:Actually most or all couldn%26#039;t be answered unless you really had a very legitimate answer.





But most of them are so true.








On a wooden chair, why are they called rungs when in reality they are wooden dowels?





Why do you park in a driveway and drive on a parkway?





Why do you get toast out of a toaster when it is still bread?





Is there truly adhesive on cassette or VCR tapes?





Why do bald people with a few strands on their head go and get a haircut?








MJ
Reply:at least i made an effort to read it and realised that:





There is not supposed to be a perfect answer cos its trying to make fun of english literature and human psychology





There are 3 repeated questions, namely


- Looking in the refridgerator ( I always hope my Mom buys something back or i forgot i had bought something neat)


- Dying of old age (Died naturally when you reach elderly i.e. 65)


- Jew in court (Tis just a procedure even I have to do that while i%26#039;m a buddhist they don%26#039;t give me a sculpture)
Reply:novels are longer


until you look old


yes they do


no they dont


yes it is


because some got left behind


because its wet


ask them


no they dont


people just do


prolly the other side


cos they ran out


both


cos he is young


no


no


different meaning


yes


no


no


yes


we just do


no


no


yes


because she never did


people are often stupid


yes


no


no


no


yes


maybe


i dont know


no you cant


yes you would





ok im bored now hope that helps


happy new year
Reply:What%26#039;s the difference between a novel and a book?


A novel is a type of book


How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?


Well, I%26#039;m 47 and they haven%26#039;t said it yet


If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it?


Sure, why not


If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth?


Sure, why not


If you have a cold hot pocket, is it just a pocket?


NMI


If humans evolved from monkey%26#039;s/apes, why are they still here?


Nobody told them they are obsolete


Why doesn%26#039;t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?


It%26#039;s still wet


Why is the show called unsolved mysteries? if they were solved they wouldn%26#039;t be mysteries.


Only to the people who didn%26#039;t understand the solution


Do penguins have knees?


No, they%26#039;re birds


Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?


No, it%26#039;s not coming on, it%26#039;s been ticking away all night


How come people tell you not to stand in front of an emergency exit when if there was an emergency surely you would run through it?


Because they might want to run faster


Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway?


She had a gimmick


In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?


Reference section


Why are both of Spongebob%26#039;s parents round like sea sponges while he is square like a kitchen sponge?


He was genetically modified


Does a two-humped camel store more water than a one-humped camel?


Depends on the size of the humps


If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk?


No, you get better milk


Why is it that if someone yells %26quot;duck%26quot; they are helping you, but if they yell %26quot;chicken%26quot; they are insulting you?


Duck is an instruction, chicken is just a name


If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?


**** no! They%26#039;re federal agents


If they have angel food cake on earth, do they have people food cake in heaven?


They got everything in Heaven


If you fart and burp at the same time, would it make a vacuum in your tummy?


Get a life


Do they call a fortune teller who cant see a %26quot;blind seer%26quot;?


Who%26#039;s this %26quot;they%26quot; you keep referring to?


Why do you put two cents in when its only a penny for your thoughts?


Because I%26#039;m generous


Can you cry underwater?


Yes, but no one will hear you


You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them?


Only if it was on no pants night


If an African elephant comes to America, is it an African-American elephant?


Only if it gets citizenship


Why doesn%26#039;t flavored gum turn your mouth that color?


What colour?


If a doctor suddenly died while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?


If the doctor%26#039;s dead, there doesn%26#039;t seem much point. Does it?


Why do we sing %26quot;Rock a bye baby%26quot; to lull our little ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground?


Because babies don%26#039;t understand English.


Why do we say we%26#039;re head over heels when we%26#039;re happy? Isn%26#039;t that the way we normally are?


Yes it is, and it%26#039;s a stupid expression


If the Wicked Witch of the West melts in water... how did she ever bathe?


In blood


If bald people work as chefs in a restaurant,do they have to wear hairnets?


No


Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that state :%26#039;Caution: May Cause Drowsiness?


Because some people take them to get high, and then operate heavy machinery


Do nudists have pin-ups of people with clothes on?


Get a life


How can Darth Vader breathe and talk at the same time?


He only talks when he%26#039;s breathing out


If there%26#039;s a wheelchair-bound comedian, is it still called %26quot;stand-up%26quot;?


Only if he%26#039;s getting married and the bride doesn%26#039;t show


When the French swear do they say pardon my English?


No, they speak French


Do people who use sign language see little hands in their head when they think about what somebody said, or do they hear the words in their head?


Depends if they know what the words sound like


How did Walt Disney figure out how to make people pay to stand in lines all day?


Advertising


Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?


Because the little man who lives in the fridge told them to


Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?


Actually they%26#039;re not


Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?


Checking wet paint just makes your finger sticky, counting four billion stars could send you blind


Why do they call someone %26quot;late%26quot; if they died early?


Same reason they call someone %26quot;late%26quot; if they died on time, or late


Why are the adjectives %26#039;fast as%26#039; and %26#039;slow as%26#039; often used in conjunction with hell, is hell slow or fast?


I dunno, never been, maybe they%26#039;re idiots like you


If the serving size on a can of soda is one can, then why is the serving size on the little can one can, too? Wouldn%26#039;t the little cans be 2 cans?


Only if there were two of them


If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family?


dead


Why are red buttons always the most important?


They%26#039;re not


How is chess considered a sport?


It%26#039;s not


Why is it when your sleeping it`s called drool but when your awake its called spit?


Actually, I thought it was called %26quot;sleeping%26quot; and %26quot;being awake%26quot;


If a hermaphrodite got sent to a certain gender prison, which one would it get sent to?


A hermaphrodite isn%26#039;t an it


If a teacher were to teach a younger grade than they were teaching before, would they be %26quot;degraded%26quot;?


Why didn%26#039;t you call the non-gender specific teacher an it?


If you get chemo-therapy do you lose your pubic hairs?


Yes I do


Would you die if you didn%26#039;t pee?


I%26#039;m gonna die whether I pee or not. But it%26#039;s more comfortable to pee


Why does every Abraham Lincoln impersonator sound the same, even though there are no known audio recordings of the man?


What man?


How%26#039;s come people tell you to stay a kid for as long as you can. Yet the moment you do anything childish or immature they tell you to grow up.


Because children should be seen and not heard. Like you


Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don%26#039;t lay eggs.


Because the Easter chicken got killed crossing the road


When Jewish People go to Court, they can%26#039;t swear on the bible, can they?


Most of it, they can. Just rip out the New Testament


If marbles are not made of marble, why are they called marbles?


To save confusion between marbles and marble


If you dig a hole through the center of the earth, come out on the other side, and then let go, would you be falling down or floating up?


Down, back to the centre, where you would either melt or implode, which is what should have happened the first time


Could you be a closet claustrophobic?


Most are


Could someone be addicted to counseling? If so, how would you treat them?


Get actors who pretend to be interested in what the counsellor is saying


If ketchup is good on french fries, how come it isn%26#039;t good on mashed potatoes?


Because nothing is good on mashed potato, it sucks


Where do all the daylight savings hours go?


To the other side of the world


Why doesn%26#039;t the hair on your arms grow as fast as the hair on your head?


When did you last check my armpits?


What happens if a black cat walks under a ladder and breaks a mirror?


The tradesman usually kicks it


Why when people ask you %26quot;what three things would you bring with you on a desert island?%26quot; no one ever replies, %26quot;A BOAT%26quot;


Maybe they%26#039;re scared of sharks


Why are elderly people often called %26quot;old people%26quot; but children are never called %26quot;new people%26quot;?


Because old is the opposite of new and also young, In this case they are young people


How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt?


He puts corks on the fingers of his left hand


Why doesn%26#039;t broccoli come in a can?


Broccoli is a vegetable. Vegetables don%26#039;t come


Can you slam a revolving door?


Yeah, sure why not. Make sure there%26#039;s someone in it.


How young can you be, but still die of old age?


Ask a doctor


What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover under a ladder?


Step on it


Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils?


Yes, unless it%26#039;s a woman


Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?


I believe I already answered that question


If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons?


Yeah, but he couldn%26#039;t hold them. Y%26#039;know, being a bear


What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get Well card?


Live with it


Can you read a picture book?


Considering a picture speaks a thousand words, then yes


Why does it say %26quot;shake well%26quot; on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets?


Because ketchup bottles are glass, and you can%26#039;t squeeze them


Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?


You got me there


Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?


Only if it%26#039;s done by a mermaid


Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol? I mean..really could we save that many people by getting those darn five year-olds with headcolds off those forklifts!


No but those drug addicted forklifting tylenol freaks need a warning, just in case


If mirrors need light to work, what happens if you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror?


Never used them, but I believe they operate with infra red, which is light, and would be detected by the goggles


if you%26#039;re on an American airline, and you land in Canada and stay on the plane, is the drinking age still 21 or does it change to 19?


I would say it would stay at 21


What happens if every team in the NFL goes 8-8?


No idea what you%26#039;re talking about


What shape is the sky?


round


If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead?


No. I already told you


Why is it written %26quot;May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts%26quot; on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves?


This is America you%26#039;re talking about, right?


If you only have one eye...are you blinking or winking?


Depends how many eyelids you have


If you have a gun and you ask, %26quot;can I ask you a question?%26quot; and they say %26quot;fire away%26quot; should you shoot them?


Only if you%26#039;re already pointing at them


What is a chickpea if it is neither a chick nor a pea?


Something else entirely


Why is it called the People%26#039;s Republic Of China when China%26#039;s not a republic?


It%26#039;s not. It%26#039;s only called a republic when it%26#039;s a republic, like now
Reply:Bo0o0o0oM!!!





sorry my computer had jst blew up...
Reply:1)A Novels Shorter Than A Book And There Is Different Types Of Book And Only One Type Of Novel


2)Any Age


3)Yes They Have To


4)No They Only Own The LAND


5)Yes


6)They Didnt Have Time To Fully Evolve


7)Cause Not Alot Of Glue Sticks To Plastic/Glass


8)Hence It Being Called Unsolved Mysteries


9)No They Just Have Legs


10)Cause If There Was A Emergency That Was A Women In A Labour She Would Need To Get Out Fast Using The Emergency Exit And You Wouldnt Need To Go Out So You Would Need To Not Be There


11)They May Have Being Painted Or Special


12)Neither


13)Cause Its A Cartoon


14)Yes


15)Ha Ha


16)Cause Duck Has Two Meanings


17)I Dont Think They Do (Depends If You Have Insurance I Think)


18)No


19)No Thats Ridiculous


20)No Just A Fortune Teller


21)Dont Ask Me Ask Them


22)Yes You Just Have No Tears


23)Whos Gonna Go In With No Pants


24)No Cause They Cant Change Their Accent And Theyre Animals


25) A Special Chemical Thats In Gum


26)The Patient Cause The Other Doctor Is Dead


27)Cause Its Soothing To The Baby


28)Languages Are Crazy


29)She Didnt Cause Her Face Paint Would Come Off


30)Yes Because Its Hygene


31)Cause If You Dont Realise Theyre Sleeping Pills Youll Know Now


32)No Thats Crazy Talk


33)Its A Talent Of His


34) No They Call It A Sit down


35)No


36)Both


37)Hes Intelligent


38)They Dont


39)A Chemical


40)Cause They Can Check The Paint They Can%26#039;t Check The Stars


41)Cause They May Have A Low Life Expectancy


42)Any Way To Use The Word Hell People Will Use It


43)No


44)He Is Still The Queen


45)Cause Red As A Colour Simbols Danger Or Importance


46)Chess Is A Hobby Not A Sport


47)Because You Cant Help Drooling But You Can Help Spitting


48)The One It Felt Most Comfortable In


49)No


50)Yes


51)Yes


52)Cause Thats A Old American Accent


53)Cause They Should Be More Mature At A Higher Age


54)Cause A Easter Duck Would Be Stupid


55)No


56)Because They Used To Be Made Out Of Marble


57)Youd Be Caught In The Middle


58)Yes


59)By Counseling Themselves


60)Cause Fries Have A Saltier Texture


61) A Magic Black Hole


62)Less Light


63)The Unluckiness Overcomes The Black Cat


64)Because They May Not Be Able To Drive A Boat


65)God Knows (Ask Him)


66)By Struggling


67)Cause It Would Go All Wrinkly


68)No


69)Youve Already Asked Me This


70)Cry


71)Which Pupils


72)Youve Asked This Aswell


73)Because He Might Like The Taste Of Hand-Honey


74)Your Very Unlucky


75)No


76)Cause You Can Squeeze To Get The Last Drop Out Of Ketchup Packets But You Cant To A Bottle


77)No


78)You Get Half The Punishment


79)You Never Know


80)You Can Barely See Anything


81)Changes To 19


82)It Gets Boring


83)It Dont Have A Shape


84)Depends If Its A Christian Court


85)You May No Know Its Peanut Butter


86)Both


87)Yes


88)Ask God


89)Its Just A Name
Reply:What%26#039;s the difference between a novel and a book?


a novel is usually fiction





How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?


50, you have had to made it to the top of the hill.





If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it?


yes, but that%26#039;s if you believe what they tell you





If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons?


And what fingers would he hold the sppon with..besides..addicts their fix fast..they%26#039;d skip the extra step.





How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt? Very carefully





Why doesn%26#039;t broccoli come in a can? you%26#039;d get two pieces to fit in a can literally.





Is eating a mermaid considering cannabailsm?


If you eat anything above the waist. then yes.





If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth?


No only a few hundred or so feet down.





If you have a cold hot pocket, is it just a pocket?


damn skippy.





If humans evolved from monkey%26#039;s/apes, why are they still here?


we didn%26#039;t.





Why doesn%26#039;t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?


it needs to be open to air or friction





Why is the show called unsolved mysteries? if they were solved they wouldn%26#039;t be mysteries.


To grab you.





Do penguins have knees?


I think not.





Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?


It%26#039;s going off on your azz to wake the fu*k up!





How come people tell you not to stand in front of an emergency exit when if there was an emergency surely you would run through it?


You%26#039;ll block it physically.





Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway?


Sally strung them on string.





In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?


they put it in Religous texts and documents.





Why are both of Spongebob%26#039;s parents round like sea sponges while he is square like a kitchen sponge?


two rounds don%26#039;t make a right. ha





Does a two-humped camel store more water than a one-humped camel?


no the humps are fat





If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk?


hella yeah





Why is it that if someone yells %26quot;duck%26quot; they are helping you, but if they yell %26quot;chicken%26quot; they are insulting you?


duck is a more noble bird than a chicken and also an action.





If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?


If you are a criminal ..nope





If they have angel food cake on earth, do they have people food cake in heaven?


there%26#039;s no need for food in heaven





If you fart and burp at the same time, would it make a vacuum in your tummy?


yes and destroy your heart





You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them? Nope.





If an African elephant comes to America, is it an African-American elephant?


only if he is put in slavery for many years





Why doesn%26#039;t flavored gum turn your mouth that color?


becuase it%26#039;s flavour





If a doctor suddenly died while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?


If he died..he%26#039;s dead..





Why do we sing %26quot;Rock a bye baby%26quot; to lull our little ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground?


It%26#039;s a subliminal threat as to what will happen if they don%26#039;t fall asleep quickly. .





Why do we say we%26#039;re head over heels when we%26#039;re happy? Isn%26#039;t that the way we normally are?


because if we were heels over head we%26#039;d be down..or dead..





If the Wicked Witch of the West melts in water... how did she ever bathe? she uses soda.





If bald people work as chefs in a restaurant,do they have to wear hairnets? .nope.





Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that state :%26#039;Caution: May Cause Drowsiness? just one of those things ..





Do nudists have pin-ups of people with clothes on?


oh yea





How can Darth Vader breathe and talk at the same time?


He%26#039;s like a very obese person.





If there%26#039;s a wheelchair-bound comedian, is it still called %26quot;stand-up%26quot;? Yes because when the audience applauses they will stand up.





When the French swear do they say pardon my English?


no they say: pardonnez moi englais





Do they call a fortune teller who cant see a %26quot;blind seer%26quot;?


nope





Why do you put two cents in when its only a penny for your thoughts?


your thought aren%26#039;t as important as your two cents in. We don%26#039;t always say what we are thinking..so what we say costs more





Can you cry underwater?


yup// titanic.
Reply:i really wanted the ten points, but i can%26#039;t answer any of your questions - do you think i%26#039;m dumb?
Reply:I answered a couple. I would have done more, but this is starting to get boring.





What%26#039;s the difference between a novel and a book?


A novel is a book that tells a story, and is usually read for pleasure. A novel is a book, but a book is not necessarily a novel. A book could be a textbook, a children%26#039;s book, a picture book, etc.





How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?


People who die of old age just pass away in thier sleep, not due to a disease or illness. So really, anyone over the age of 60 can die of old age, its just more common in people over about 80.





If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it?


They do. In case someone comes late, plus they usually make an agreement with production companies that sell the movies that they will play the movie so many times per week, whether anyone is watching or not.





If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth?


You do, because your deed more than likely says you have mineral rights, its standard in most all states.





If you have a cold hot pocket, is it just a pocket?


It is still a %26quot;Hot Pocket%26quot; as that is the name of the product, not a reference to it%26#039;s temperature.





If humans evolved from monkey%26#039;s/apes, why are they still here?


Humans and modern apes evolved from a common ancestor, which probably no longer exists. But aside from that, even if human did evolve from the same apes that exist today, the apes still exist because only a small number of them experienced the mutations that gave rise to humans.





Why doesn%26#039;t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?


Glue has a solvent in it, and when it evaporates the glue stick to whatever you glued together. In the bottle the solvents can%26#039;t evaporate. Leave the top off the glue bottle overnight and see if the glue sticks to the bottle





Why is the show called unsolved mysteries? if they were solved they wouldn%26#039;t be mysteries.


because there were some things that were mysteries for years and then were solved and there are some that are still unsolved





Do penguins have knees?


Yes. Penguins appear to have very short legs and no knees because only the lower leg is externally visible. Their knees and upper legs are feather covered, hiding them from view.



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